Outrageous numbers and funny slash lines

The beginning of a season is always a time for hyperactive statistics that become mind-boggling if not for the SSS (small sample size) screaming at us. But just because some number are unsustainable over the course of a long season, that doesn't mean that they are not fun to look at. Here is a list of some early statistics that are tickling this funny bone so far this early season:

• Austin Jackson has a BABIP of .565! Jackson has made a career of defeating BABIP logic where the average batter should have a .300 average for all balls put in play. Jackson already had a .375 BABIP for his career. But .565!? That is the epitome of "hitting 'em where they ain't."
• Matt Kemp has a slugging percentage over one. And at 1.026, that isn't even his most stupendous numbers. His ISO currently sits at an amazing .538 with a wOBA of .615. And he is batting .487. Yeah, that's a pretty good ten game stretch.
• Slash line fun #1: Josh Hamilton is having so much fun hitting that he hasn't bothered taking a walk. His slash line: .390/.381/.756. Yeah, when you are raking that good, who wants to walk anyway.
• Josh Willingham is second in the majors to Kemp with a .514 on-base percentage. Yes, that deal is working out pretty well so far.
• Derek Jeter is leading the Yankees with a 1.005 OPS. Whuh?
• Marco Scutaro has put every ball in play during every at bat this season. He has yet to strike out. Unfortunately for him, everything he hits has been hit at somebody. His BABIP is .167 and that is what he is batting.
• Slash line fun #2: Russell Martin leads the majors in walk percentage at 27.3 percent. Which is a good thing because he isn't hitting. Those walks give him the screwy slash line of: .182/.455/.182.
• Nick Hundley is not having any fun this season. In 31 plate appearances, he has one hit. One. His batting average is currently, .043. But with his one hit, he has scored one run and driven in one. All he needs is 99 more to drive in 100.
• Marlon Byrd of the Cubs isn't having much more fun than Hundley. He has two hits in nine games.
• Emilio Bonifacio is hitting well again this season. He is batting .316 with a .409 on base percentage. But he has the most hits in baseball without the benefit of an extra base hit. All twelve of his hits have been singles. His ISO is .000.
• Four batters have an OPS under .300: Byrd (.212), Ryan Raburn (.241), Miguel Olivo (.274) and Jose Tabata (.295). Those look more like batting averages than OPS figures. Ouch.
• J.P. Arencibia has a 3.2 percent walk rate and a 38.7 percent strikeout rate. Ugh. And his BABIP is .067. That's the trifecta of a bat start.
• Alejandro De Aza is making his hits count. He is only batting .250, but has a slugging percentage of .594. Five of his eight hits have been for extra bases.
• Aaron Harang has a 16.03 strikeout per nine inning rate and still has an ERA of 5.91.
• Aroldis Chapman has pitched eight innings. In those eight innings, he has struck out fifteen batters without allowing a walk. He hasn't given up a run either.
• Yunel Escobar, the Blue Jays' shortstop, has already had 37 assists in just nine games. He hasn't made an error.
• J.D. Martinez of the Astros and Joe Mauer of the Twins have already hit into four double plays. They are both on pace to hit 66 of them for the season.
• Kevin Youkilis has the lowest WPA score of all major league batters at -0.68. His clutch score is -0.25. Ouch.
• Clint Barmes of the Pirates has swung at 52.3 percent of pitches outside of the strike zone. Not surprisingly, Barmes also leads the majors with a 22.2 percent swinging strike percentage. Yeesh, that's higher than Mark Reynolds who is second at 20.3 percent. Russell Martin leads the majors by only swinging at 10.1 percent of pitches out of the zone.

Aren't small sample sizes fun!